Shitglish

I am exposed to a series of English faux pas everyday.  Spaniards don't speak English, today I learnt they speak shit-glish. 

Case in point: 

I'm on a bus with the kids and the grim coordinator in front (ill-meaning man whom I don't like) seriously announces over the PA:

"Alright evlebahrdy, evlebahrdy! Evlebahrdy much put on their shit-belts."

Shit-belts alright!!