My 2010 in FB Statuses

It's a given that most of us post what we think on FB.  But it's even more startling when you get an app that shows your most-used words for the year. 

This time, what we post of Facebook reveals then, a certain type of deeper, stronger truth.  These patterns of speech speak of our thoughts.  From a deeper level, they show the stories that we tell--yes, of others--but really, more of ourselves.

I thank God He's really been the centre of my 2010.

Up, up and onwards.  I can't wait to see how 2011 will turn out :)

Real Christians---

Primary School Cravings

At 12.20am I am suddenly craving dark sauce fried mee.  You know, the type you get at breakfast stalls at hawker centres.  The ones that usually also sell chee chong fun, yam cake, dumplings and zok (porridge) for breakkie.  Cooked well, dark sauce fried mee is oily, glistening with dark sauce and sprinkled with a small amount of tau geh.  Sooooo SHIOK!

They used to sell it at my first school--the now defunct Alexandra Primary.  I remember how I could get a small serving for 30cents, and a super grand plate for 50.

Strange how these memories hit home so late at night, so far away.

Holding Onto God's Word

Psalm 128 (Amplified Bible)
A Song of Ascents.
    1[a]BLESSED (HAPPY, fortunate, to be envied) is everyone who fears, reveres, and worships the Lord, who walks in His ways and lives according to His commandments.
    2For you shall eat [the fruit] of the labor of your hands; happy (blessed, fortunate, enviable) shall you be, and it shall be well with you.
    3Your wife shall be like a fruitful vine in the innermost parts of your house; your children shall be like olive plants round about your table.
    4Behold, thus shall the man be blessed who reverently and worshipfully fears the Lord.
    5May the Lord bless you out of Zion [His sanctuary], and may you see the prosperity of Jerusalem all the days of your life;
    6Yes, may you see your children's children. Peace be upon Israel!

How often do we trust what we cannot see?

Admittedly, we are creatures of touch and habit.  We like our senses tickled, our emotions appeased.  We only (and conveniently) believe in things that can be weighed.  Or at least felt.

But time and time again, when I open my bible or read a devotional, God constantly challenges me to believe in the things that I cannot see.  Because what can be seen, touch, tasted, is always subject to the laws of time.  And ironically, because we can feel them, they are always temporal.  Even happiness/frustration/trying circumstances, will pass. 

Because if what can be seen is ephemeral, what cannot be seen, must then be eternal.  God's word cannot be seen, it is invisible. It surpasses the physical laws of Nature and confounds the wisest of men.  The only thing that it is, is sure.  And God's word lasts forever.

Maybe if we, being trapped in temporal circumstances, choose to step out and hold onto His word which is eternal, I think we naturally become closer to being truly unshakeable---especially in times of shaking.

Train like a Horse, Eat like a Cow 
7.45pm Dinner:
1 bowl fried brown rice
2 slices of fat omlette
2 plates of tuna salad (just chomped down the greens)
Calamari sticks
Chicken bolognaise balls with mushroom sauce
1.5 slices of brown wheat french loaf, dipped in olive oil
1 mandarin orange
1 small cup of shandy

10.30pm Supper (2hrs 45 mins later....):
Still hungry!   So I cooked and had...
1 big bowl of bee hoon, with egg, stalks of spring onion and chopped up fresh onion, and
1 bowl of cornflakes with milk

Verdict?  Finally, reasonably full.  I should go to bed before the hunger kicks in again!  Goodnight world.  I am so knackered.

Backside Backhand

or, to be more optimistic:

"I come, that you might have Life, and Life more Abundantly."

 Life, as it currently is, is very much similar to the progress of my backhand.  Some days it's awesome, on other days it suffers severe psycho motor sparsticism.

Strangely enough, despite the flux and wane of emotions, I do know that it is improving.

It, being the shot
---learnt a fresh idea about the backhand from a new coach who has joined our group.  When I hit my backhand, I prepare with my chin touching my racquet arm, and after follow through/end of shot, my chin should be touching the other arm

and life in general
---perhaps not the circumstances per se (am running flat out of money), but definitely my view to them (seeing God as the source of my providence, and knowing that things will be okay).

All too often, I still fall prey to worry and anxiety.  My finances are waning (I have about EUR700 left in my bank account), and the initial understanding I had with the Academy to have a left over salary of EUR300/month for the Residence work I do, has "turned" into money that automatically pays for my tennis fees.  Subtitles: out goes the active income.

In many respects, I feel like a banglah---salary, benefits and all.  It disturbs me even more knowing that I try so hard as a Singaporean athlete, but policy makers (unknowingly?) opt instead, on spending millions on a YOG event that stirs no public pride.  Sometimes when I focus on this, I feel disappointment, frustration and a genuine sense of helplessness.

But in the thick of this, thank God for God.  He has continued to assure me through John 10:10 that despite it all, I will be fine.

"I come, that you might have life, and life more abundantly."

"I come"---Not that I go.  Or that I try.  The pretext of Jesus saying that He comes, is that I am standing still, or in a moment of stasis.  Yes, I could be moving too, but the focus is on Him as the enacting one.

"that you might"---In order.  So as to.  For a specific purpose.  Jesus is saying that He comes with a particular end in mind.  And what is that end?

"have life"---Stop and think a while. What does it mean to you to have life?  What is real life?  The rest of the verse seems to push the reader to that contemplation:

"and life more"---So often we ask or wish ourselves to live life like someone else does--because in our eyes, they have more of life than we do.  But the Lord is saying that when you let Him come, you live that exact life that is so much more...

"Abundantly."---an incredible word that we too often forgo.  I don't even think that I understand the word.  My life sometimes seems surrounded by so much lack and limitation.  But perhaps this is also where the greener-grass theory can kick in.  A more abundant life sounds good.  Why not take Him at His word.

He's either telling the truth, or posing as the world's biggest liar.  But while I contemplate this, I'm going to take You at Your word.  You say You'll come.  So come Lord, come!

Silent Noise
As is with every bout of silence, there is an equal, opposite reaction of noise and chaos, somewhere.

This past week has been especially grueling on the training front.  Think playing in four to zero degrees Celsius.  Fingers numbing to the cold and noses dropping off.  On the great side, I think I'm finally getting used to the trawl of the weather.  On the flip side, I am sore all over.

Just a minute ago, I contemplated posting on my FB status:
"Body sore all over, except for triceps.  Maybe I can work those out in the gym...."

More soon.